North Node in Capricorn- South Node in Cancer
A STRONG PUSH TOWARDS AUTONOMY
The commitment that you have chosen to pursue in your long journey has to do with autonomy and independence. You have a strong need to get rid of a series of constraints that, while they can nourish and protect you, in the long run become an obstacle to a real adult life.
This will enable you to face those choices that must come from within and cannot be influenced by external needs, but must rather made after careful consideration of your personal needs and goals.
It is therefore essential that you are able express yourself in a way that goes beyond the imprinting of your historic family. Jung claimed that we should be truly independent upon leaving the parental home and until doing so, will not be free psychologically.
In fact, having strong conditioning makes you unable to face your own choices even when these do not reflect your family’s expectations. It is most important that you, and only you, take upon yourself the weight of the choices you are going to make in life, even taking responsibility for difficulties that may occur in the future.
BEING A LEADER
To be able to feel truly independent, you need to develop a sense of self-discipline that must come after having introjected an external authority figure, put this figure into discussion and, through the resulting crisis, to have kept something that is truly your own and abandoned the rest.
You really have the all makings of a boss, but a leader needs to be someone who has reached the highest level of maturity in order to take on responsibility for other people, and to act as a guide and role-model.
You need to become your own boss and this is what will really ensure your sense of internal structure that you have tried to achieve for so long and must absolutely achieve.
The qualities that you need in this journey are discipline, patience, an ability to assess but also the ability to wait until the conditions are right to make the necessary steps.
HEART AND HEAD TOGETHER
You have developed a remarkable ability to sense what is going on around you, to tune in to what comes from those who are dear to you, and then to put these together with rationality, depth and the power of concentration: the head and heart together can work wonders and enable you make the right decisions without forgetting that which comes from within.
From this dual structure, you can venture into any type of situation, finding the honesty and rigorous qualities that allow you to do what you have in your mind, and which can also stand the test of time.
By unifying the way that you feel with your thoughts, you are able to align the timing and rhythms necessary to build anything. Being able to manage a system means having spent a lot of time at the service of that system and having, therefore, seen and understood the laws governing its maturity.
Your heart and head can also represent a kind of stairway, and in fact, in that image of climbing, there is a clear reminder of the need to build and to mature.
SELF-SUFFICIENCY AND INNER FEEDING
Achieving self-sufficiency and autonomy requires great effort to be spent in nurturing yourself internally: without the ability to feel satisfied and to protect yourself and gratify your personal needs success will be very difficult to attain, because you will always need someone to accept you, someone that nurtures and comforts. This will make you feel dependent upon them, preventing you from being able to give voice to your own thoughts and feelings.
Only when you take control of your emotions and work on your vulnerability, which has long remained trapped in immaturity, will you be able to find the real force that sustains you internally; a moral force which will allow you to feed the child inside you and make it live and grow.
This is the first form of responsibility to take on: achieving autonomy by denying or removing your own needs means becoming harsh and externally projecting your own fragility.
THE PURPOSE OF YOUR JOURNEY
To face the world and your role in it will require you to become almost your own parent as this is the only way to avoid the need to find external crutches that can keep you on your feet, but which can also take you in the wrong direction.
You must be able to be involved even though your head needs to maintain a detachment from the direction that you want and have to take. If something holds you back or obstructs you, it means that you are too involved and you’re still feeding from a root that must now be internalized.
The feeling inside you that you have developed will be highly useful to you in your great need for personal affirmation as it may be that extra something that allows you to evaluate others, understand their points of reinforcement and at the same time, helping them to work on and to overcome their own difficulties.
Only when you come to integrate the emotional with the rational, will you be able to celebrate that symbolic marriage which will allow you to feel complete and self-realized.